


Just Watch The Movie

by monthadog (mysteriousMonarch)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Black-Red Vacillation, M/M, Quadrant Vacillation, Species Swap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-29
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-07-18 22:48:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7333690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysteriousMonarch/pseuds/monthadog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat is sick of John choosing terrible movies for the two of them to watch together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Watch The Movie

**Author's Note:**

  * For [artisticGenocide](https://archiveofourown.org/users/artisticGenocide/gifts).



> My friend requested species swap JohnKat black to red so here it is! Ta-da!

“Alright Egbert, what sort of shit movie do you have planned for tonight?” Karkat asked as he barged passed the troll that had answered the door. 

“I can assure you that it is far from shit,” John answered as he closed the door to his home after his boyfriend had invited himself in.

“Ha!” Karkat exclaimed flopping down on the couch. “If it’s anything from your collection then, yes, it is pure, unprocessed, steaming excrement. You probably have the worst taste in movies I have ever seen another living being possess,” the human said as he kicked off his shoes and got comfortable on the sofa.

“Oh sure,” John grinned and went over to the shelves that housed his movie collection. “Then why do you keep coming over to watch them with me?” he asked slyly. 

“In hopes that one day my superior taste in movies will rub off on you and make these movie nights less painful,” Karkat grumbled.

“Is that why you can’t keep your hands off me midway into the movie?” John grinned when he turned around with a DVD case in his hand.

“Shut up,” Karkat snapped while his face noticeably darkened. John opened the DVD case and popped the disk out to inspect the back.

“Think you could hand me one of those tissues to wipe this off with?” the troll asked. He looked over at the human on his couch and betrayed the twinkle in his eye. Karkat narrowed his eyes at him but reached for the tissue box regardless. He tugged out the first tissue only to have it be connected to the next one in the box. He paused for a moment then continued pulling the second one out slowly only to have it be linked to the third. Karkat yanked violently and pulled out a continuous chain of about six tissues.

“God damn it, Egbert!” Karkat growled. John erupted into a fit of laughter nearly dropping the disk on the floor. “I fucking hate you,” the grumpy human muttered and shoved the heap of tissues away from him. John wiped tears from his eyes under his glasses frames and turned to pop the movie into the player.

“So what are we watching?” Karkat asked apprehensively once John had taken a seat on the couch beside him. 

“You’ll see,” the troll bit his lower lip with his over sized front teeth to contain his wild grin. Karkat huffed and crossed his arms then watched the previews play on the television screen. Eventually the previews ended and the menu came up on the screen. John had chosen for them to watch _The Room_.

“Nope,” Karkat announced. “Fuck this. I’m out,” he said as he stood and made to go towards the door.

“Oh come on, Karkat. You haven’t even seen it yet,” John pleaded. “You might actually like it.”

“You say that about every cinematic train wreck you show me and I never like them,” Karkat argued. “Besides, I think you have officially reached god tier of shitty taste in movies. I have heard that this is literally one of the worst movies ever made.”

“Well I’m sure there’s been worse,” John shrugged.

“You do this on purpose don’t you you crotchblistering prickish fuckstench,” Karkat said as more of a statement than a question.

“Would it make you feel better if we watched _Gigli_?” John suggested.

“Fuck no!” the shorter human shouted. “It would make me feel better if you weren’t such an insufferable tool and actually had halfway decent taste in movies. Holy fuck you’re infuriating!” he fumed.

“Aw, Karkat, I’m flattered,” John said touching his hand to his chest in a humbling gesture.

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” Karkat ground out through clenched teeth.

“Alright, if it’ll make you stay I’ll let you pick the movie,” John acquiesced.

“Right, because you just have so many great ones to choose from,” Karkat rolled his eyes before going to look through the collection of movies. John pulled his legs up onto the couch and curled up as he waited for his boyfriend to make his choice.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Egbert?” Karkat exclaimed suddenly. He turned around with a DVD box in his hand and waved it around violently. “You’ve had _She’s The Man_ this whole time and never told me?”

“Oh, I kind of forgot I had it honestly,” John laughed sheepishly.

“Well you have it and we’re watching it,” Karkat tossed the DVD case to John who had to sit up quickly on the couch to catch it. “Put it in, dickprince.” John laughed at the nickname and got off the couch to go put the movie as Karkat sat back down. A moment later he returned to his seat to get comfortable again. 

“Are you ready to see what an actual decent movie looks like?” Karkat questioned as the opening scene began.

“I am perfectly aware of what decent movies look like, but whatever you say,” John retorted scooting closer to Karkat and attempting to rest his head on the other male’s shoulder.

“Watch those horns, assmunch,” Karkat grumbled when one of John’s horns managed to knock him in the chin.

“Oops,” John giggled receiving a groan from his human boyfriend. 

“Just watch the god damn movie,” Karkat grumbled and wrapped his arm around John. After a moment of thought Karkat leaned down to place a soft kiss on one of John’s horns earning a rumbling purr from the troll. “I love you, asshole,” he said.

“Love you too, grumpy,” John responded and snuggled closer then fell silent to watch the movie.


End file.
